Reader Mail
dimanche, février 25, 2007
oh p.s. i was wondering since u dont take showers very often, how do u keep...how should i say...fresh? lol
N,
Well, obviously “FRESHAZIMIZ” is not my current theme song. Indeed, remaining “fresh” in the African Sahel is more art than science. And though I am not the Rembrandt of this realm, I have learned a few secrets. I shall now impart them onto you, for future reference.
2. Body Spray. Shipped from the good old
3. Face and Feet. I have found that if these parts of you are clean (especially for the women, cuz their clothing covers all other parts of their body)… that is, the visible parts… people tend to assume you clean :D
4. Clean/Pressed Clothing. My laundry boy is on point! Washing clothes in the desert is no easy task… yet… he amazes me every week… even heats up a rock and irons them… My clothes look better here than they look in the
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P asked:
What’s the most difficult part?
Figuring out unwritten cultural laws can be tricky. For instance, there has been a chicken wandering around my yard for a week… I have not had chicken in so long… But I do not know how this works. How long does the chicken have to be on my property before I can claim it as my own? I mean… I’ve been feeding it and fattening it up… and praying that it does not have avian flu… does that mean that its mine now? And if not… what happens if I eat it anyway?
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J asked:
What do they eat of birthdays? Foo foo?
J,
Yes.
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C asked:
Have you found your future husband yet?
Although many Cameroonians seem to think that Peace Corps is actually a Cameroonian matchmaking program… all I can say is: No, thank you. Although, PC Cameroon has the highest rate of volunteer marriages… I will definitely not be part of those statistics… No offense,
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L asked:
Hey, what happens if you get HIV/AIDS?
As you already know, in order to contract HIV, I’d hafta be a) Scrumping (Believe me, not happening). b) Have some other sort of exchange of fluids (i.e. blood transfusion, accidental needle prick, etc.). or c) Breast-fed (Also not happening). Now, in the case of (B), the PC medical office has a PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis). The trouble is… the treatment is only available in the
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A asked:
How did you let this happen to me? How did you let it be so long before I wrote you?!
A,
What?
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G asked:
What do you do for fun there?
G,
You know… I was just talking to Molly (one of my sock puppets) about this the other day… about the new friends I was making and hanging out with. She was making fun of me, cuz I had started talking to Joanne (one of my shadow puppets). I think Molly is just jealous (she has low self-esteem).
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Do you miss me?! I bet you have forgotten all about me!! Why don’t you update your blog more often?? When are you coming back home?!
Of course, I miss you, stewpedheads. I do not update my blog more often because I live in the bush (I do not have running water out here, yet alone a wireless connection), it takes 2-7 hours (I’m totally serious about that variable… One day it takes 3 hours… the next….5… the next 7… And its gonna take longer once the rainy season starts) to get to the nearest internet café, and half the time… I trek down there and the internet is down >:/ And you know how I roll. I’ll come home when my job is done, and not a moment sooner :] Well… unless I am MedEvaced (medically evacuated- knock on wood)
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAYS!
Jingy!
Amrita!
You guys are so old!! :D Hope it was a good one, and that you did not do anything that I wouldn’t do :o Of course, this means that it is acceptable for you guys to go commando for days on end:]
posted by Me at 8:55 AM
5 comments
Roses & Thorns (aka- The Valentine’s Day Entry) *CBT
dimanche, février 11, 2007
As some of you already know, we used to hafta do this stewped activity at the end of our RA meetings called “Roses and Thorns.” It was a basically a time to b*tch about all of your residents and then applaud yourself for accomplishing great tasks, such as not getting drunk until your 14th shot at that party last night. Anyhow, as many of you already know. I hated these meetings, in general (It was worse than the staff meetings at Summertech. Love you, Steve!). But specifically, I hated Roses & Thorns. Mine usually went something like this:
Thorn: I hate that I have to participate in Roses and Thorns .
Rose: On the bright side, this means that we are almost done with this pointless meeting. Then, I can go watch America’s Next Top Model and pretend to study for P. Chem.
Alas, I have found inspiration in the thing which once I hated. C’est la vie.
ThOrNs: I hate the fact that:
- People take so much for granted; worrying endlessly about what they don’t have rather than nurturing and cherishing what they’ve already got.
- Americans are more likely to show compassion towards strangers than to family and “friends.”
- People constantly flap their jaws about their “strong convictions” of which they know nothing of. Unfortunately, for the rest of us, these loud, empty opinions affect the lives of millions of people (ie. Stem-cell research, nuclear power, “solutions” to poverty, etc.). I am still waiting for the day in which I encounter a politician who can actually tell me the difference between multipotent, pluripotent, and totipotent cells. Go read a book, go back to college, or shut up and accept the fact that you don’t know everything… not even what you are preaching as truth.
- In a world where so many die of hunger, so many more die a different death because they are starved for something so much easier to provide: love.
- So many girls and woman don’t know their own worth; and instead, they allow themselves to be defined by other people.
- Very few mothers know how (or do not care to put in the effort) to raise real men nowadays.
- Most people (myself included) tend to blame the aforementioned on the women, when we all know that fathers also need to step it up and start leading by example.
- I missed my Dad’s surprise birthday party (but I hear it was fantabulous!).
- Africa, land of my birth, has become a continent of beggars with an absurd sense of entitlement.
- Westerners continue to throw money at the above problem. This is what created this phenonemen in the first place.
- A disgustingly large percentage of this money from NGOs is grossly mismanaged. A gamillion people die, not because there is no money, but because of the rampant (and even worse, accepted) corruption in third-world countries. You know that check you sent to that well-known organization to help children in Africa get medical care? Yah, well… unless you did your research and chose very wisely… that money was probably used by a government official or healthcare administrator to buy him/her a new car or a house or several expensive prostitutes. Awesome.
- Some of the men who work at my health center make the poorer female patients (teenagers and women) pay via sexual favors. This makes me want to vomit continuously. And I can do nothing about it without risking my own safety.
- I have this opportunity.
- I still have my best friends from elementary, middle, high school, and college. We laugh in the faces of time and distance, for they have only made us closer. Along with my family, they are my heart; the loves of my life.
- I have more than one “love of my life;” and that I was lucky enough to know, recognize, and experience love so young.
- My parents raised us well. My brothers and sisters have become beautiful people, both inside and out. They will accomplish great things. Scratch that. They already have:]
- I keep encountering the most amazing people from all walks of life. Teachers, missionaries, mon blanchisseur (my laundryboy), random people on the street (Hey Brad!), random people on Amtrak (Hey Krista!!), other PCVs (Hey, you crazies! Miss yoouu), and all the other glorious people who haphazardly light my path.
- I got an excellent education at one of the best (read- nerdiest) colleges ever.
- I am very easily amused.
- We once made our sister eat grass (see above statement).
- Although, we are poor black folk, my Mommy found a way to throw my Dad the party of his lifetime.
- In my provincial capital, I can buy a 2002 Merlot-Cabernet Sauvignon from Mont Flory, France for $8. And some delicious French cheeses (camembert, brie, beaufort, you name it) for about $4. The bright side of living in a former French colony:p
- I traded Kelly a Gin & Tonic (liquid gold) for a Burt’s Bees Shampoo Bar (Divine, though I only get to use it the 2 or 3 times a month which I actually have the opportunity to shower).
- I can travel to different dimensions (sans alcohol and/or other drugs). Yah, that’s right :D
- I have a Solio, which is lovingly wedded to my Ipod. Truly, a match made in heaven. It has preserved my sanity so many times that I have lost count.
- The lovely ladies at the patisserie already know what I want when I walk in (une Charlotte Russe, une jus mélange, et une Mambo. Quelquefois, avec une beignet avec sucre), cuz I am there every time I am in Ngaoundere :]
- I can school pretty much all of you on any dance floor on any given day >:D
- I am so modest.
- People actually read this blog, and that it actually amuses some of you.
- I have always had the most awesome birthdays ever, and this past one in Cameroon was no exception :] Thanks girls :]
- Running water and electricity await me upon my return to the “U.S. and A.”
- Time flies when you’re having fun… or dying :]
posted by Me at 9:24 AM
7 comments